I was so high I couldnt even listen to music i was terrified of the potential knowledge i would gain.
I remember saying "sorry" to the blunt before throwing it out the window
I remember sucking his bleeding finger and then it's all black until he had his hand down my pants.
she hid the dish soap because she was afraid someone would confuse it with the margaritas and drink it instead. her reasoning was "theyre both soo pink...i cant tell them apart"
He woke me up at 3 am kneeling on the floor pissing and yelling, then he passed out and stole my comforter. I want a new roommate...
Standards? I'm sitting on his couch eating microwaved ramen wearing his wife's t-shirt. I don't remember what having standards even feels like.
i woke up this morning and saw her in my bed and i said to myself, I think I might have a drinking problem.
Nothing says happy gameday like waking up in only an ACC Championship shirt in the qb's bed with a different football player
LESSON OF THE DAY: Saying Everclear gets you out of explaining anything.
2015 is a year for health and mental stability and alas we are not yet there so yolo
Are we going to go home and do it or do I have time to eat my nachos bell grande first?
Dashing through the vodka, in a tinder swiping rage, all the fuck boys get a no, laughing all the way.
I associate the Game of Thrones theme song with his dick now.
Dude this weed has me so paranoid.
Yeah tell me about it I just screamed after I coughed because my own cough scared me.
Hey
Gfdhklhgfxzyuikl$
GODDAMNIT WHY AM I MISSING THIS
Randomize
