I can die happy now, I have been kicked out of strip clubs on six different continents
For his 21st I'm getting a fancy hotel that way he can at least sleep in a nice bathtub
Excused from finishing the term project because my lab partner got arrested. For the second year in a row. Public school, I love you.
I need to stop drinking. Side note- we have a party bus tonight. So the drinking will have to end after that
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Well if were past the bullshitting stage yes if not then no I'm not that kind of guy
It's safe to say that bucket of tequila night can NEVER HAPPEN AGAIN.
That penis will go down in history. It's the Helen of Troy of dicks. I will conquer it and the tale will live on for future generations to learn from
THIS IS A TERRIBLE REWARD FOR NOT GETTING PREGNANT.
Also topless tea is a thing that happens in our apartment. Ready yourself.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I bought more beer than I could carry and managed to fit it all in the fridge. It's an alcoholicmas miracle.
And the next thing I knew I was blowing this random hot italian bartender with an uncircumcised penis in his work closet
My uncle showed up to pick us up at the bar just as I bought a drink so I put it in my pocket #drunksmart
sending my old camp counselor nudes. childhood memory win or new low?
Our faces when the strip club was closed looked like the grinch just stole Christmas ☹️
Soon to be ex is nowhere to be found. Her attorney/new BF just showed up. 30 minutes late looking hungover. Pretty sure I'm getting the kids AND the house!
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