I am good. I dancing. Drinking but dancing fine.
Nakedness is not a toga. Just sayin
I need some transition time from spring break.. can we day drink between classes this week?
Thanks for feeding me more tequila shots to prevent me from trying to fight her last night. Horrible logic? Yes, but you are the best friend ever
well judging by the amount of dired blood around my nipple rings i'm gonna assume it was a good night
We welcome drunken adversity.
With open legs.
she crawled under her car and passed out. Unfortunately her feet were sticking out and someone called 911 because they thought she had been run over.
i'm only riding in the trunk because they put the case of beer back here..
OH GOD NOT SANTA BABY. NO NO NO. YOU'RE LIKE 85. OMG MULTIPLE WOMEN. NO NO NO STAHP.
We were escorted through the guys dorm by 5 kids with nerf guns and zelda shields. I felt like the president with a fucked up secret service squad.
The squirrels are partying on my roof again. Now they're just rubbing it in that I'm home alone on a Saturday night and they're having orgies.
Literally too hungover to clean. I'll get the frosting off the table tomorrow, ok?
Jesus, you make out with one twin then sleep with the other and suddenly they don't want to play soccer with you... Men can be so sensitive...
Can I borrow your google glasses to make a sex tape?
dave might be using McDoubles to pay for dances
he has gotten at least 7 lap dances out back
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