They say rihanna has been dating several mets players. They go on to say that she feels safe with them because they can't beat anybody.
I was amazed that you fell flat on your ass and still managed not to spill them drinks in your hands. Your getting good at this.
I just smoked pot in front of my old Elementary School. It's like my Childhood and Adulthood are coming together in this awesome thing.
Congrats on having the best tasting nipple at the bar last night.
I inspected his penis with a mini flashlight to check for visible stds...he was clean
why the fuck are my pubes caked with bread crumbs?
How exactly do I approach the whole "Well that was fun. Am I purchasing the Plan B or you?" topic?
Blasting venetian snares and drinking a beer. I love being an adult. It's like being a child but with beer for breakfast, better music, and no one yells at you.
He said he actually "met" me for the first time through a picture his housemate had of me, drunk and passed out in a pool of my own vomit, on the floor of his basement.
And when I feel bad about myself I go to the library and suck my pen over an open book, counting the seconds until a guy sits across from me and tries to get my attention
He is so pussy whipped she has made him change his name to Toby
I did wake up to a random meat and cheese plate next to my bed, that was a thrill.
She's one of those people who could be either 16 or 23. In which case she's too old for me or in dangerously jailbait territory for you, bro.
Should I bring my 4 pairs of bunny ears? Or is that too weird?
4 pairs might be a bit much
Her tits are so fantastic they gave him a panic attack.
Randomize
