we were taking shots of hot tequila, which is even worse than it sounds
My plan for valentine's day: take a shot for every guy I've slept with. To keep me from going to the hospital I'm only doing half a shot for small dicks
We're friends. And when I drunkenly send u a pic of my left testicle i would appreciate a response.
Come over so we can hookup and eat tacos. Those are 2 things you can't possibly turn down.
It's ok, I like adventure. Just ask my vagina.
Okay now that I've been wanting to eat these hot cheetos in the bathroom, I know it's time I need to stop smoking and go to sleep.
Would it be inappropriate to trade Christmas cookies for sex?
I got propositioned while wearing the bottom half of a horse costume. It's like god is apologizing to me in the strangest of ways.
Summer bikini season begins today. I hereby declare the commencement of the 2013 HUNT FOR CUNT.
Well according to all the calls, texts, and Facebook messages, I threw up on you guys last night.
I manage to fit my wine bottle in my koozie and the rest is history
Are we going to go home and do it or do I have time to eat my nachos bell grande first?
Alcohol won't break your heart. I mean, unless it's all gone maybe
long story short, the bouquet was used as a sacrificial torch
I'm the one who said we should take things slow. I'm also the one who forced him into the back on my car so we could have sex.
Randomize
