So for Valentine's Day...I finally swallowed. I feel like I earned that steak.
it was like i was on a global safari of uncircumcised men
My dick was out way too much saturday not to get laid
the mechanics of walkigng feel weird right now everyone lools like a demon
what does alcohol mean
They have 12 kegs and 40 bottles of liquor and a pool with a diving board. And hardly anyone at this wedding knows me. Should be a great night
I just saw a black chick with an eyepatch. This is a once in a lifetime opportunity.
This is exactly why you shouldn't bang your bartender. Although the awkward free shots are a plus.
See I would make a great girlfriend. My surprises are sex and burritos. What else do guys want
Amnesty Wednesday? I'm free to do dirty things to you and you can't laugh or judge?
I was trying to remember why my knees hurt then I remembered I was twerking on the countertops.
Sex in your truck helped me start regaining feeling in my jaw. Thanks!
I don't need to marry the guy. I just need some filthy, shameful wish fulfillment sex and then live out the rest of my life on the bean farm.
On a scale of 1 to alcoholic in withdrawal how ready will you be to start drinking as soon as you arrive on campus?
I brought my porn computer to class by accident
How much porn do you watch if you need a special computer?
Just woke up to the cat unconscious on my stomach, his face between my tits, purring to bring down the walls. I'm endeared and horrified at the same time.
Randomize
