He introduced her to the DMA meeting by saying: in the past few years i've never seen someone work so hard for so little success
Jason just peed on the potty all by himself!!
"omg awesome!, you do realize we aren't together anymore"
nah, shes just mad because we went through all her fb pics and tagged her crotch as all the guys shes fucked
When we ran out of red solo cups we switched to Starbucks cups for beer pong... Who doesn't want to live in Seattle?
like why cant he just admit that he still wants to fuck me even though im underage
I just woke up and shes still asleep next to me with her vibrator inside her and on. Whats normal protocol for this situation?
He tried to say the picture wasn't him. Like I'd forget his curved boner.
We had sex in front of Notre Dame Cathedral, but I lost my wallet. God giveth and God taketh away.
When she talks to me all I hear are 5 generations of inbreeding speaking.
Just warning you now f you do not get intoxicated with me in front of the family on thanksgiving we are not related.
I'll be on pinterest all night planning crafty things to do with my cats in 10 years.
i ate a whole tub of butter with my hands last night. don't tell me about rock bottom
I'm buying groceries with adderoll. I hope I'm never this broke again.
I told him. He hasn't said anything. Crying and holding cats is probably what is happening.
Are we allowed to ho on the roof?
Randomize
