I only want to know people that are dynamic intelligent and totally insane
Who would win... a chainsaw pooping pterodactyl or a bear with machine guns for feet. big debate about this right now
i'm not sure when i reached "slam my own hand in the door" status but my half attached fingernail is not grateful.
I don't know if I want to cry scream puke or go somewhere and drink more. This is such a weird emotion.
HE'S turngign 18teen real soon.k
I'm in the city buying alcohol. I just got warned by a homeless man on the street that I shouldn't look so pretty "in these parts"
Every single item that was in my fridge is now in my hot tub. Please help
There's green glitter on my nipple rings. #mardigras2013
Everyone should know the rule that if your dicks touch during a threeway you just make lightsaber noises and move on.
Apparently "I have the beer shits" isn't the excuse my boss wanted to hear. So sue me
Makes sense. My grandma just did this shot. MY FAMILY KICKS ASS.
I didn't want to see any of his nipples and now I've seen all three. Thanks.
I told him I was on my period but he says "I'm a doctor, you think I can't handle blood?" And just went for it. Jackpot
You told his date she had the tits to be a stripper and the personality to be the pole. Of course he's pissed off.
I just walked in on my dad beating it.. There's not a fucking therapist in ARKANSAS that can help me with that!
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