When she showed me how she could touch her toes without bending her knees, suddenly her face didn't worry me quite as much.
We turned everything surrounding BP and the oil leak into a "that's what she said" drinking game. We've been drunk for a month
shes a 6ft ginger. she brings nothing to the table except for awkwardness
dream priorities were more important than voting today. don't tell me you wouldn't keep going back to sleep to find out who would win a fight between oprah and godzilla
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we hooked up. but it was that weird mix of getting naked and watching Balto that made it so awesome.
Dude that girl I hooked up with Tuesday is in lecture. I told her I was from the Dominican visiting my cousin and was leaving the next day. Hiding under my hood and hangover.
Once you mention butt plugs, conversations always take a turn for the worst.
I was wondering how I got the burn marks on my boobs and then I remembered....
The baked potato bra?
Do you want the fat one with an ok face or the skinny ugly one?
It doesn't matter as long as our shame is in tandem.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yeah and you keep saying "I know how to win America." While running away from us
Go have fun. I'm gonna go shower off the regret.
In hindsight, I probably should not have let the waiter give me a chiropractic adjustment on my neck last night.
he drove over two hours to fuck me and came in 3 minutes. he got mad when I asked him if it was worth it...
he's smothering me... and not in the good, can you move your thigh off my face please?.. way
But I think I successfully seduced her with my alias.
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