Odds of those being real?
One in who gives a fuck
College is just filling the gap until I get a rich girl pregnant
I think her nose is broken... but I think she's just drunk enough to fall for the whole "sex releases endorphins, so it'll feel better" line.
The lesbians are drunkenly meowing in the hallway again. This is the shit I'll miss at home.
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Level of drunkenness: just now when I sat down on the toilet, I had to double check to make sure I wasn't sitting on somebody's lap.
Someone just took a shot from my crotch. I should not have to drive home
well i just got discharged from the hospital after getting pegged in the head by a t-shirt gun so thats how my night was.
She kept throwing quarters at him and yelling "Goooaaallll!!" whilst taking her clothes off one by one. I'd say she had a good night
We have bigger issues at hand... Does anybody know someone in the kalamazoo area that is missing a pair of stilts ?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I still have beer shits from last weekend. Dying from dysentary is a real threat at this point.
Man I can't wait till Thursday if strippers and beer are what you consider "research"
I literally just skipped to the fridge when I realized we had enough vodka left to get day drunk
I've spent hours masturbating before. It's actually my favorite Sunday activity
Apparently "Welcome to the Sin Cave" is not how I'm supposed to answer the door
He just sprayed AXE in his mouth to get rid of his bad breath... THAT DRUNK
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