fuck the hobbit
what about unicorns?
fuck those pointy horses
i friday night watching house. god, i need a life, friends, and a legitimate fake id.
you kept running across the street. everytime you made it across successfully you took something off. can't believe there were no cops around...
oh thats it?
someone shit in a solo cup and left it at the base of the stairs. fuck orlando dude.
He doesn't like you, he likes u not having a gag relfex
I have no idea what happened last night, but you're the only person I remember smashing my face into. Be honored.
They usually take it with their boobs. It's like a horizontal motorboat
I just remember her dragging me inside in a panic saying we needed mentos and popcorn I have no fucking clue how we ended up asleep in her closet.
Just make it a game! Like 20 questions STD style.
I took a yellow and pink pill, all of a sudden my sex drive is back, and for some reason all I wanna do is fuck Amish dudes
Good God, I miss doing unknown drugs with you.
OMG I COULD FUCK HIM FOR POT, THIS CHANGES THE WHOLE GAME.
He kept kissing me on the cheek when I was pretending to sleep while he cried
Does she know she is talking to people who slam shots of fireball and chase it with vodka?
I'm going to confession for the first time in 6 years. Where do I start, the gay sex or rampant alcoholism?
By the time we got to McDonald's you were sharing a Big Mac with a stripper.
Randomize
