this is amzing! feels like my body is having sex with its surroundings!
I have a new reason to go to work: I can tell which 3 of my coworkers are sisters just by looking at their butts.
I told her I was horny and she said to forget it because she has vagina drama.
WHAT IN THE HELL IS VAGINA DRAMA?!
His threats seemed pretty legit for a 6 year old
Well, I just hope you know I had your best interests at heart when I put your sandwich down my pants.
She's been drinking and was roller blading. I'm sure you can do the math
Bon Iver should never be played when you just ate shrooms.
Well my dad thinks I wake up at 3 or 4 am every day. Really it is just all the booty calls, but I'm glad he thinks I am so motivated
How can someone be so bad at fingering? It's such a simple concept
I asked him for something to clean up with after sex and he handed me a sham wow. A SHAM WOW
My vagina has made plenty life decisions and I would like to point out very few if not any of them were in my favor.
Between fucking and sleeping I woke up missing four out of five of the earrings I was wearing. It's like a star rating system. I had to give him props.
It's a Saturday night and I am in bed with two cats, a bottle of Riesling, and I'm masturbating to Iron Man. I'm great at being 21.
Perfect attendance and not being drunk since Sunday. This is a new leaf if I've ever seen one
Her mom Is so hot that when she was bending over i just zoned out starin at her ass her dad slapped me on the back an said let me tell you son everything you see here is mine and you had better realize i felt like simba
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