the bitch is dead man
YOUR DOG DIED?
no i meant my mom has passed out .. so i'll be over soon.
Come on the kid is gayer than me
Like the straightest thing he could do right now is take it up the butt
I never had a problem I couldn't slut my way out of.
Is it wrong that I want to take the baby bump in her facebook pictures as "meal-ticket"?
im sorry but you know it was a good night when you got tasered on the ass and didnt even feel it
we played a my little pint drinking game. It was awesome.
I haven't been sober in 4 days.
Then be sober
No.
I saw this news story about two naked Satanists being arrested so I thought I should ask if you need bail money or pants
Def over. He sent me a nude selfie but cropped it right above his junk. Total Silence of the Fucking lambs looking.
So you're on like a list there now..."Do not under any circumstances give this person a knife. Serve them in plastic cups ONLY"
If my bootycall doesn't bring over a Baconnator, I swear to fucking God, I'm not letting him in. The hunger is that real. Forget his Persian dick.
I just bought a bottle of lube for my car.
If you can't have hot, loud sex in a dorm for the last time ever, what can you do in this world?
Should I apologize to him for saying I wanted to punch him in the face as I was digging through the trash?
And you tried to get me to have sex with you in our Harry potter closet lol
Randomize
