I love the "adulterer" look on you. It's hot.
Its part of my fall instant classic line.
Wouldn't pinatas filled with coke be awesome idea for cinco de mayo?
It was the first time I had seen his penis when it wasnt hard. It just looked so vulnerable and a little bit depressed.
i'm sick of coming in second next to bourbon.
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Im going to hell in a hand basket. With a ribbon tied to my head. I'll be like a puppy for the devil.
Also I just took a shit at a bar so always remember that ANYTHING is possible.
nope. It turned out i wasnt the drunkest person asleep in tacobell parking lot.
2 men making out for 2 seconds to trick a cop so they don't get arrested for being pulled over rolling a blunt is not gay.
I threw up outside of a cab while waiting in a drive thru Mexican line while others who i don't know watched from their cars while they ate. Dinner and a show.
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Is it a bad thing that I'm trimming my nose hairs in anticipation for the 8ball to be delivered?
I mean there are things broken right and left, I woke up surrounded by dog statues, and we had a vodka bubble bath.
Oh yeah. I pretty much fucked the universes brains out lastnight. It was glorious.
well all i have to say, besides fuck you, is YOU try assembling ikea shelves while high on molly.
Soooooo I may or may not have accidentally been a catalyst in a destroyed marriage.
If we both don't have awesome filthy sexual experiences to share in the morning...we are no longer best friends.
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