Ha. No worries! So loud here &god I love drag queens! How does it happen, the congealing?
Add "its too hot" to reasons why I don't get fucked anymore
the last 2 times weve had drunk sex ive had to get the morning after pill.. he's turning into a real expensive fuck buddy.
Protip: If you slur the word 'tipsy', you've progressed beyond tipsy.
There's so much relief when you realize you wake up in your own bed
I am fine. Katie thinkr i broke things pole dancing. I am coherant.
It's 4/20. I'm not too worried about "healthy"
He called me baby cakes during sex... Can U not
Sincerely. Thanks. You could have thought of anyone sitting on your face but you chose me. :)
The convent might be a nice break from real life
I guess what I'm trying to get to is that my dog sneezed on my dick earlier and its really taken the joy out of my evening.
I was just informed that I asked for a glass of wine at the police station
I'm sure it would have gone very well with the cigarette you lit there.
i think the people from taco bell are onto us. they had my order ready today at 3am BEFORE I even got there.
Literally I woke up the other day and the girl part of me was like “GET CUFFED MOTHERFUCKER” and I went ham on tinder.
I'M GOING TO DIE ALONE WITHOUT ANYONE PRETENDING TO BE A MARRIED COUPLE WHILE DRUNK AT A MALL WITH ME
Randomize
