How would you go about getting a hold of the country star that you slept with and are now potentially pregnant with their baby...?
myspace Music?
he just kept repeating that I have nice areolas
Gotta love hanging with Nat. By the time guys realize she isnt going home with them, they've spent enough money and time to think I'm a good idea.
Can you pinpoint the moment you decided it was acceptable to trade blow jobs for beers or was it a gradual slide?
I went out as a member of the house of Gryfindor and came home as Snooki
Would it be tacky of me to tell the two girls I just found out he's been sleeping with on the side that I've been having gay sex with him all semester?
I have a cat, a bottle of wine, and a Brazilian man. I need to catch you up on my life
This storm betta not fuck with taco tuesday
Dinner at my parents is vodka, lemonade, cheese ad crackers. Why would I leave?
He's all enlightened and liberal. My next beefcake will be much more Neanderthal.
I just realized I haven't looked at our horoscopes lately. If mine says anything about tweakers, I'm burning my phone.
Oh shit oh shit oh shit.
BURN THE PHONE.
Dude, you spit in your shirt pocket saying "I'm saving it for later" then dove head first into the pyramid of beer cans we set up.
We had sex on a couch that was held together by Velcro. Want to know an unsexy sound? Velcro ripping apart under your bare ass.
Who fucking spams baby shark at a sports bar
How drunk were you? in an effort to seduce him, you demonstrated your lap dance skillz on his dog.
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