I had a good time, probably would have a bigger headache today if you were in town.
dont quote avril lavinge. im to drunk.
Last night when I was hammered I set a reminder to tell you that your boobs are my favorite ones in the world, so this is me giving you that message.
She wants out first dance to be to 98 degrees i do cherish you...remember how i said we didn't need open bar....
med student doing my blood work at the AIDS clinic just hit on me after I told him i was having unprotected sex, but didn't think i had HIV.
just woke up COVERED in glow sticks and glitter. didn't even have to turn the light on to puke.
you kept telling everyone how your ninja turtle shell also functioned as a backpack
We lost track of him for only 10 min and he gets kicked out for sneaking into the kitchen and trying to operate the deep fryer.
got high to the hills theme song. FEEL THE RAIN ON YOUR SKIN. no regrets.
I can feel myself smiling like 10 minutes after I stop smiling, and that's just like... so awesome.
do you think if she looks enough like a dude i have to come out to my parents?
No it's a real cult, with original ideas and shit like that
You drank the pool water to get rid of your hiccups
So I have three weeks to get rid of his girlfriend and fuck him senseless before he goes to jail
Found Ryan’s keys in the fridge. On my way back.
Also, tell him he missed Nathan passing out in the dryer.
Randomize
