I am drinking with my family and the average drinking tolerance is a shot and a half. I feel like the incredible hulk.
his logic is that since hes already cheated on her w me its doesnt count
did the walk of shame through a baseball field. .A little league game was going on. Proceeded to buy a hot dog at the concession stand. the looks were priceless.
I may be Daddy's little princess, but doesn't mean I can't be the blowjob queen.
hey, this is the ginger girl from the party...i've thought about it and I wanna join the american girl drinking team
I caught him with his head in the spinach bag this morning. He was laughing demonically saying, "i love spinach, yes I do."
My mom just came into the kitchen and watched me take a double shot of whiskey and chase it with a beer and said "you are my son." Proudest family moment ever
So I have a scar from when the stripper tore off my underwear .... Best birthday ever
I just literally had a dance party in my closet. I've never been this blazed.
I've been here 20 minutes and a sweaty naked man has kissed me on the cheek.
Apparently I was drunk enough to call he police station and ask if there was a problem with me.
AND I HAVE A NICE COCK! A STRIPPER TOLD ME SO IT MUST BE TRUE!
I can't decide if this outfit makes me look like a pirate. I also can't decide if I care if it does.
I knew my sister shouldn't have gone to the bacherlotte party. Two of the other brides maids have black eyes and my fiancé called me and asked if this is the crazy she's marrying
we had to invent a new word for how drunk I was last night
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