Yes. Being a lesbian's wingman is a fun as it sounds
chatroulette drinking game turned into a foursome.
He dated me before I started drinking. I feel like he deserves a consolation bj for all the effort he had to put in to get in my pants.
3 girls crying in the bathroom at the bar. Its like a Christmas song
I just had a boat ride of shame. With Senior Citizens.
I'm eating my emotions. I am no longer interested in anybody other than my own hand and vagina.
What is their policy on bow ties and belligerence?
When you glanced over and and mouthed "I'll take the fat chick" I knew it was going to be an epic Sunday night.
His face matches his life choices. Both are train wrecks.
I almost got decked by a guy who looked like Mr. Clean. How was your night?
Because you put the dick in ridiculously amazing boyfriend. And you deserve to have nice things happen to your penis. That's why.
Guy just walked in with a 40 and a Honda steering wheel. Where the fuck am I?
The next time you invite me out to a bar full of cougars warn me first. I never felt like a piece of meat before.
I'M GOING TO DIE ALONE WITHOUT ANYONE PRETENDING TO BE A MARRIED COUPLE WHILE DRUNK AT A MALL WITH ME
I'm sorry, but the bed has won this battle. I got up, changed my shirt, combed my hair, put on some deodorant, and then looked at my bed and got back in
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