Why are handjobs necessary in class?
kicked my backpack and turned on my vibrator in the middle of class. success.
Fucking him was like shopping for my first training bra.. Embarrassing yet extremely useful
The bloodstain in the garden looks like a sad face. Like I don't already know this is bad...
Wasted on the beach. There's children everywhere. A six year old girl even stood over me with her hands on her waist looking down on me as I was passing out by the water
I realized it was a bad idea when I broke my collar bone
I may have just flashed my roommate as he walked in while my towel was falling. Now he knows what an American sized penis looks like I suppose
I got laxative. And a toothbrush. Because who wants to buy just laxative on a Friday night?
Dunno. My heart says "no", my brain says "maybe" and my dick says "YES YES FOR THE LOVE OF GOD YES!!"
I should become a firefighter. Who uses his cock to fight fires. Like a Superhero.
The doctor said that if they accidentally damage my nerve endings I could permanently lose feeling in my lower jaw.. Honestly the first thing that came to mind was how that would affect my blowjob skills.
THERE IS A MAN IN THE BATHROOM IN COLONIAL GARB GET HERE
I haven’t taken my socks off in over 36 hours. I should add that to my bumble profile.
The report specifies "melted cheese food" as the cause of the burns. Your pride, like your cock, isn't getting out of this without heavy damage.
I just realized this morning that my fridge is stocked with coronas, hot dogs, and cheese dip. And I just got waxed. High-five, your best friend is on track to be all kinds of slutty fun this wkd.
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