Sooo i definitely have a major burn on my chin from kenny's ...stubble from making out for hours while coked up. Pure class.
She asked the class if starwars was based on a true story...
For the amount I put out, I should be going on way more dates.
I should do something nice for her. Like sign her up for "What Not To Wear."
i want to swaddle you in tequila
what if his mom answers? its like high school, but hes 30
sorry he hasn't talked to me since the surprise salvia incident...
I dont know. Theres no way you can be ready for the sex hurricane that will consume you.
did you not get the photos of the finger bruises on my ass?
In other news, last night I told somebody they made eczema look so good they should call it sexzema.
I need to start using my boobs for good instead of weed. Although really they're kind of the same thing
I'm home, and it turns out she didn't get it all. still picking Oreos out of my pubes.
ill dress up as a sperm donor and you can go as the cup....
I also guarantee you multiple orgasams and blueberry pancakes
Never joke about your clitoris.
Randomize
