quadriplegic porn is always funny
no. no its not
i was blowing him and "what if god was one of us" came on his playlist. I had to leave
this kid in class is playing minesweeper and just slammed the desk because he lost. thank god were normal.
you thought you were invisible so you started narrating your actions.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think being a buddhist has made me a better drunk
I don't even want to think about the kind of person who would shit in the street before 10pm on a Sunday.
I have Denny's hours of operations written on the palm of my hand....not in my writing, in a girls writing, is that as good as or equal to a cell number?
You stumbled in at 10am, half-clothed and still drunk from last night and yelled "well, its not called a walk of pride!", then passed out on the couch.
The basket that the Naughty Easter bunny left for you at my house might keep us entertained for a little while...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i'm exhausted. do you know how hard it is to put together an outfit that is professional enough to secure a babysitting job yet slutty enough to let him know i'm down for sex during naptime?
Any man who has a face like that and a bike, deserves a vagina like yours permanently.
She complimented my boobs and then told me I smelled like teddy bears before falling asleep on the floor.
And the prospective student I was showing around had to take care of me.
He asked me what I wanted for Christmas. I told him an orgasm would be nice.
So his dick was definitely bigger than it looked in all the pictures he sent my daughter.
Randomize