Its about making memories worth repressing
Is it standard protocol to defriend someone after they give you chlamydia?
then the nurse gave me a bag with my personal belongings: phone, wallet. jacket, keys and a BTB burrito
don't think this is any sort of attachment thing but if I'm going to throw up regularly at your house, I'm going to keep a tooth brush there
Never thought I'd say this but I just want to go home, ice my balls, and pop a Vicodin.
I just want a guy that likes cats and is willing to get a vasectomy. IS THAT SO MUCH TO ASK?!
How was your 8:30 class today?
Non existent. I just threw up in my water bottle on the bus.
Like not in a "I wanna have sex with you way" more like a "I wanna cuddle your mustache way"
Well, no one has ever described you as a perfectly balanced individual
Bro, I just googled 36 year old pussy so when I do see it I won't be shocked.
Nevermind, there are three drinks waiting at the bar for me. I cannot disappoint this alcohol.
A dick pic is not a proper way to say I'm sorry
Where the fuck are you? I just got punched in the nose by a tourist
I haven’t taken my socks off in over 36 hours. I should add that to my bumble profile.
I dropped my slice of pineapple on the kitchen floor and was just staring at it about to cry. It was really good pineapple.
Randomize
