You think ghandi was good in the sack? cuz i sure do.
I'm not gay.
Soooo you want ghandi? is that what your telling me?
If ghandi gives good head...I'm in
Its fine.
the snow is so cold on my vagina.
why do you have snow on your vagina?
vodka and heels.
she added me on facebook and her celebrity doppelganger is rosie odonnel. FUCK
Chick took off her bra in the middle of class cuz it was "too hot." How's going out of state feel now?
You walked in on me taking a shit and told me to hit the bong
We were thinking he might be gay. Like how the fuck do you not even make out with a girl that made you a grilled cheese
Also, you tried to make me learn all of the presidents, in order, with a picture book as an aid. At 4 am. What the fuck?
$100 bras are my way of telling my boobs that I love and appreciate them, and all the metaphorical doors they have opened for me.
That kid who fell through your coffee table is here. In a toga.
No more Raisinettes before sex. That's what happened. I just put it together
Ok cuz s'mores night just turned into pina colada after noon and it will be mas fun
Also, I'm going to TRY and be casual this weekend, but really, we need to be serious about equally dividing our time between party and bullshit.
Because she seems like the type to give it up for a box of fruit rollups.
HIS BALLS ARE HEAVEN SENT FROM THE VELVET ANGLES.
He told me he loved me...but added "you crazy bitch" at the end. Does it still count???
Randomize
