so craigslist just dropped their "erotic services" ads. there goes our livelyhood
there was 4 little kids screaming in high pitched voices at the top of their lungs at the sox game and their mom just leaned over to me and said 'if thats not birth control i dont know what is'
So I've been to the library twice so far. Both times were for the atm, and once I was stoned. Junior year is going great.
my momz letting me make the christmas card in photoshop
so that means christmas in space?
imma make our dead cats ghosts like obi wan kenobi
My mom would probably be ok with my lifestyle as long as she doesn't see that photo of me doing bong rips in a Jesus costume.
I am dressed. And we didn't do anything. He's gorgeous and tall tho. Something nice to look at when I'm hungover
Can we skip lunch and do power hour sex time from now on? I'll let you eat nachos off my body if you really need the food.
It's a given that you're going to get peed on at a country concert
If I had that in my pants Omg I would want a shirt made so everyone knew
Found a grenade pin. Still no Dave.
Like you know your sex life is in a downward spiral when your best friend offers to sext you from Ireland
So is it weird that I am super excited for my new captain america clit ring... Or is my crotch getting too patriotic
Our house drank 90 beers yesterday afternoon before 8pm so add that to the list
Please tell me I did not drink enough whiskey to think that having sex with my boyfriend while his best friend was on the floor next to us was a good idea.
You're having marijuana delivered to you. You're buying drugs and you aren't even leaving the house. I'm sure he'll be surprised if you're NOT wearing a bathrobe.
Randomize