Oh this totally just became legit. My "boss" is puking outside my car right now. I win again.
I have taken lazynest to a new level. I took a picture of the notes on the board instead of writing them. I win.
he said "cool" when i took off my bra and proceeded to stare wideeyed at them the ENTIRE time. it was like sleeping with the kid i showed my boobs to for the first time in 6th grade.
i dont think the girl sending me nudes is qualified to pass judgement on me
He's really hot. I think he's gonna be my reason to shave this winter.
Dude, so the police showed up at my house with my wallet told me they found it in the church fountain then handed me a pamphlet on AA saying it was from the pastor. What happend?
his name is devion and he has a voice like velvet and handcuffs
She was giving me head while we were in my tree house, my mom then came out to let the dog out so she stopped so I would stop groaning, was it good? You tell me
Please send me a thumbs up pic afterwards. No homo. After you've redressed and are heading for the walk of shame out of course
Bianca brought a stripper home he's making me breakfast
You have set the bar insurmountably high with apple pie and buttsex.
of course the one day I come to class high we have guest speakers from the police department... Just my luck
I JUST BROKE A NAIL MASTURBATING. WTF I could even enjoy my orgasm bc now I'm gonna have to spend $50 on my nails.
I'm over here trying to figure out how to get shake shack delivered to my bed and Jamie is having a child
Man I just realized that my only life problem right now is that I have to convince myself not to fuck a 19-y-o
Randomize
