I seriously love my fucking boobs. They are so boobs.
At what number of girls whose last names are stored in your phone book as drinking establishments does it become excessive?
well since you're still married, you will be paying for my abortion right?
Triple a is towing cars for free tonight and tomorrow night. Can we take advantage of this ?
My only regret is that I have but one penis to give to your vagina.
My masturbation fantasy just had a wedding theme. I need new hobbies.
We tried to make ramen in a glass bowl on the stove. They called facilities to pick the glass out of the door
I was just laughing and almost crying after I orgasmed, and then almost crying because I was laughing so hard. That's new.
Does he think you're psycho?
Officially...... yes.
When / where did the additional couches appear?
Additional?
James brought one with him when he showed up. Theres still 2 outside and according to facebook, at least one more burned up.
When you get a chance, you should call Nick. He REEAAAALLLLLY wants to hear you make chewbacca noises.
Dude, please tell me you know why there's a naked chick asleep outside my room.
I mean we don't talk anymore but I still see him around wearing that sweater he stole from me after we had sex
If walking through the neighborhood with a bottle of tequila and margarita mix is postgrad life, I'm okay with it
I'm going to blow a ton of money on sex toys just so I can tell you to do better than them.
So...I'm pretty sure I have officially determined that reverse cowgirl is the only position possible to have sex in my smart four two
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