whats the name of the jew you used to have sex with that lives on evergreen?
be more specific...?
Dude I just peed on my pants. not in them though. and yes there is a difference
I had a talk with my mom about respecting myself and not acting like a whore so she will rip my nose ring out if she somehow sees that picture
Black Friday shoppers are ridiculous. I think I just watched a marriage end.
I wish a night of watching Dear John and a bottle of wine could cure my herpes.
He came to my Harry Potter marathon wearing a Hogwarts uniform. Of course I fucked him.
Now I just sit back and wait to give ass birth to pure evil.
Sex with you deserves a trophy and a day of remembrance in honor of it.
JEREMY RENNER GOT DIVORCED. I STILL HAVE A CHANCE.
i just watched a 7 minute video on people making a hot air balloon for their dog and i am a changed person
I am the most hated person in hoboken. Ive been doing drunken cake boss impressions down the street for the past 20 mins.
she brought her phone charger to the bar this bitch is ready to drink
Just because you got dumped by some loser doeant mean you need Jesus. It just means you need better friends and some booze
I had a date last night. His dog threw up in his bed while we were having sex in it.
I got drunk. Then I took a shit.
It was a good shit
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