It's not a real calculator it's a math calculator
I'm drinking in the hospital parking lot.
...she's taking her top off and singing songs from Anastasia. I swear to God were solumates.
Do you ever look back at facebook pics and say, "are those really guys I had sex with?"
that's the last time we turn jepordy into a drinking game.
Went to anytime fitness at 3:34 am drunk after the the bar and getting whataburger. Lifted weights with my cheeseburger between my knees. That's called DEDICATION.
Peeing off the roof of a motel lighting a cigar with matches and speaking fluent spanish with a chilen exchange student...how do iget into these situations?
On a toatally unrelated note, I see music in my hair
Are you considering all the consequences of doing your boss or are you just rationalizing with your vagina?
Blow job season was short but glorious.
I would agree. Whose business is it if I like to guzzle vodka by the liter on my of time? Answer: mine.
Then a third Canadian I didn't know showed up to the hotel room at like 3am. I let him sleep in our bed because he had pizza.
I had sex with him and I blame the Doritos
He dated a girl who could do the damn splits on his dick like how do you compete with that
WHY DOES MY BOYFRIEND'S BROTHER HAVE TO BE SO FUCKING HOT
Randomize
