This guy just came in and told me how he bought a clock for his cat so his cat can know when he's coming home...
halloween is SO much better on drugs, why didn't anyone let us know about this when we were kids
She is just riding on my slutty coat tails.
you said candy land and then passed out.
ps. we found your stash in the candyland game. Thanks.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I've woke up in his bed 4 out of the past 6 mornings. I feel like this might be the time to learn more about him then his first name and what kind of beer he drinks.
I could study for finals and ace all my tests but wheres the fun in that? id rather black out and hope for the best
Im going to be coked out with hello kitty fire arms. Valentines day can suck my dick
All I've done this weekend is cum and drink. I think it's safe to say I'm dehydrated.
I woke up to a shattered My Little Pony garbage pail, a black eye I don't know how I got and no one will look me in the face. Fuck tequila.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
unless you have a dick and you were thinking of chopping that off
He told me we shouldn't hang out because it would be weird and then snap chatted me a picture of his dick
Let's be honest, I am pretty sketchy looking.
Ask him to BK for an ice cream cone and do him in the car. That counts as a date
Do you remember when you first moved into my parents house with me and we came home to find that my dad bolted the headboard to the wall
I never thought I could be this turned on by a man wearing racoon tails.
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