I hope to God it wasnt poon. That odor was unnatural, it was satanic pussy.
If I sit on the seam of my jeans just the right way when the bass hits, this might be my new favorite band.
I put it into a sports analogy for him: there are three teams in the league- friends, fuck buddies, and dating, and the fuck buddies roster is full, pick an alternate team
Well I say she's a whore. All four of her kids have different last names.
BUT, one is Johnson and the other is Johnston. She gets some credit for that
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Alright I don't know how you'll link it to me but yes I left a nearly empty 12 pack on your trunk
Her idea of kinky involved a tazer
wtf?
I'm going back tonight
I moved my bed to the living room so when a girl walks in she has to decide right away if shes in or out
Hey my results were negative. Your chlamydia train stops here. Happy hunting!
Naw, the sex dungeon had to come down so we could build a nursery. Cause and effect really.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He was super stoned and then he compared doing meth to having anal sex and told me to "ride that cowboy." The cowboy being my ex.
It's Breast Cancer Awareness Month!!!! What random hook up should check my tata's this year?!?!
sidebar: i fucked your brother last night
Got to work this morning and thought... Did I really dance on that pole last night
Dude you came into the room last night soak and wet and told me you just took a shit in the shower
You kept shouting about how you were the king of all bitches...and doors, for some reason.
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