Hey man sorry I got all grabby
So I went home with some chick last night... I'm not sue what's worse: not getting a nut at 5am, the condom breaking and not being replaced, feeling poo when I put my finger in her but, sleeping on a heroin mattress in her living room, her swine flu coughing fit at 7am or realizing she peed the matt at 10am. Actually it was probably the fact that she continuously told me she was the classiest girl in boulder.
bl l w
this should be fun to decipher. I'd like to buy a vowel.
i've been fucking this guy since february and just found out he might be uncircumsized. currently google image searching to confirm.
can i drink enough to forget this semester even happened?
he couldn't find his key, so we just had sex on his parent's porch while we waited for his mom to get home.
hey girl hope you're alright, you hit that tree really hard. have a good night.
i realized boys travel in groups of 3's and girls travel in 4's..thats why it gets so tricky
like hot dogs and buns.
The last thing I remember is teaching our waffle house waitress to do the stanky leg and promising the grill cook we would come see him at his other job.
seriously, who doesn't want to get shitfaced and have sex to the backstreet boys?
He's like all my past boyfriends wrapped up into one fuck up. It's enjoyable to watch.
My boobs just got me out of my third ticket last night
i'm so proud. i woke up to nearly seven feet of basketball player in my bed this morning
you win. again.
This makes me appreciate being single with no prospects.
You hit your head and proceeded to fall in the floor, curl up in my lap and make me rock you like a small infant. I was beginning to worry until you started to sing "Rock me momma like a wagon wheel".
Is it unhealthy for me to do shots of pinnacle by myself in my apartment right now? Asking for a friend
Randomize
