I think I just saw the travelocity gnome in leather chaps.
I didn't think it was possible but there may actually be TOO MANY pictures of me tagged shotgunning.
THERE ARE SO MANY GREAT DICKS IN THE WORLD. HOW DID I NOT DISCOVER THIS SOONER!?
we woke up to him feeding us cheetos at 3am. and by feeding i mean shoving them in our mouths and saying "i mean who doesn't like cheetos"
I just took my birth control on the way to class with a 1/2 melted jello shot I happened to find in my purse from Friday night. I told you I was going hard this year.
It's times like this I miss having my nipples pinched
He would have to make magical things happen in my nether regions to actually make me vote republican.
I would have been very attracted to her had she not been reading me my Miranda Rights
I should start wearing my Batman shirt more often when I drink. Good things happen. All sorts of shit.
My life is literally the worst. I was just laughing so hard at how hot they looked feeding each other the brownies and then I was like DON'T CRY
well all i have to say, besides fuck you, is YOU try assembling ikea shelves while high on molly.
i just hope we're both dead or in prison at the same time
a homeless man let us know that my friend was asleep in the bushes outside my house on main street. So just a small get together.
skipped tacos for a blowjob. No tacos. No blowjob. More importantly...no tacos. Wtf?
I could hear it slapping against his thighs under the robe!!!!!!!!! You are a lucky girl!
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