god help us all. i just saw an infant wearing a onesie that said "i don't know who my daddy is"
I just googled "semen solvent" and got nothing. there has to be something that will wash this shit off!
I see a marketing opportunity
Just boiled hotdogs in bongwater. NOT a good idea.
You should come over. I am making a celebratory I got laid by a huge penis cake.
and then you went into taco bell without pants...and surprisingly you weren't the only one there without pants
Dear vodka that I hid in a water bottle in the backseat of Blairs car, I'm sorry that she gave you away to a man on side of the road with an over heated engine. I'm sure the car doesn't appreciate you as much as I would have.
he described going down on me as being like 'entering a jungle of deliciousness and fur
One is full of apple juice. One is full of tequila. This is real russian roulette my friend.
I don't know if I have the sustained energy level for partying hard
Not a choice. You are mistaking my comments as options. My statements are facts. This is what is happening.
I was riding her and she yelled "fuck me" then someone in the room next door yelled "you don't have to say it if youre doing it."
Yes. I feel like complaining about sex all the time with a 21 year old might be punishable by death of the sex gods so I try not to
figured after she passed out and i threw up in her bed, morning sex would be pushing it.
I swear the crows are laughing at me.
You my friend are stoned into submission
oh, i solved that problem. i told him i wanted to steal my roommate's nephew. radio silence. haven't heard from him since.
I HAD SEX WITH COLBY AND HIS FIVE YEAR PLAN IS TO STEAL A REALLY EXPENSIVE PAINTING AND ASKED ME IF ID BE INTO HELPING HIM AND I WOKE UP IN HIS BED TO A WOMANS TUBE TOP NEXT TO ME
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