After last night I still want u
But please keep that on the DL
haha i think we're both just down to be fuck buddies..but i do have a hickey and a bit of a big lip and fucking burns on my knees..note to self hooking up on a golf course is NOT that exciting
Please don't tell anyone I peed on your wall.
The cops found weed in michael jacksons house today...it makes up for the child molesting, I like him more now.
do you think there was ever a doctor who smelled his finger after giving a prostate exam?
i'm wearing my white shorts to coax my period out of hiding.
found the other keg... it's in the tree
how convenient is it that the kid i'm fucking lives right next to planned parenthood?
James and whatshisface bought me drunks. I am drinks.
he gets drunk and then tries to eat the lasers at the dance club
plan d- we get drunk, go see that Justin Bieber movie and freak out 13 year old girls.
Very impressive. My GPA is the same amount of orgasms I can offer tonight (valid only tonight): 3.5
Soggy bong water carpet is the worst kind of carpet.
Do you sleep with the same women I've already slept with on purpose?
Im covered in coffee vomit and urine and none of which are mine
Randomize
