Haha dude youd die if you were here. Girl presenting is defending the new testament and did her report on JESUS. best believe i'm gonna ask some hungover, atheist ass questions
How fat would you say she has to be before I can consider this a threesome
He's my palate cleanser. He's my mint sorbet. He's my saltine cracker. He's who I fuck between people to make the next one better.
...Then she just started hitting me with a loaf of bread.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He went around feeding all the high kids pretzels. He's like their god now
She made me go down the fire escape when her mom came for breakfast.
pregamed for the floor meeting. so stoned. i keep thinking my RA is shrinking.
I find it worrying that she bit me in bed. Then proceeded to write her name in bite marks. All without ever losing the rhythm of our fucking.
Just do let me go home with anyone especially I a guy with a hair sweater
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
OH FOR FUCKS SAKE! SOMEONE TOOK ME FOR A GODDAMN PROSTITUTE!! IM WEARING LEG WARMERS!!! THAT IS LIKE THE LEAST HOOKERISH THING TO WEAR!
C'mon. I'm still an alcoholic at heart, regardless of its broken or not
why is there a wheelchair in the hall and why does it look like we banged in it?
Do you know this guy sitting in front of us? Asking for my vagina.
I let my daughters ex boyfriend take me home from the bar. Hey, at least he's old enough to drink
Today's forecast: 90% chance of bad decisions, good stories, solid new dick and artichoke pizza
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