you turned your livingroom into a bong?
rhymes with "ouble enetration"
it's just weird having a massive boner in the morning when you could have used it the night before.
i don't remember it, but i know we had sex because my stuffed animals were facing the wall
Sex and the city 2 and twilight getting released in the same month. God hates mankind.
My mouth holds just enough water for my bong
I'm making you a bingo card for hookups of the school year 2011-12 so you can make even worse life decisions next year
Did you seduce any young men into coming home to your love nest of poutine and jäger bombs?
I might stash a bottle of vodka in your mailbox, that way if I wanna leave early I can drink in your frontyard till you get back.
I just remember lots of butts and something about ranch dressing.
I even put my vibrators back in the bedroom instead of the coffee table. If that's not growing up then I don't know what is.
I made out with the uber driver for free weed, I thought he deserved it
I PUT IT IN THE UNIVERSE THAT I WANTED TO STAB HIM AND THEN SOMEONE DID! KARMA IS A BITCH AND SHE IS BEAUTIFUL!
Oh the best part of having sex with him was that he made me a smoothie after
And then you screamed, "I JUST WANNA POUR MAPLE SYRUP ALL OVER HIM AND RAVISH HIS BODY!!"
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