Luol and I just scored with two 40 year old married chicks. They dropped us off on the way to soccer prctic. The kids in the back were confused. Call me.
If I see one more commercial for The Secret Life of the American Teenager, I'm going to punch the next teenage girl I see in the uterus and scream, "Wear a condom!"
booty call
i swear to god if you come over i will kick you in the pussy.
Fact: my bamboo plant has grown 2 & 1/2 inches since I started watering it with bong water
Apparently I confessed my love for him last night. Also, my love for cash4gold commercials.
At the bar. Madeline and I totally brought our own pitcher from home because they always run out. Hello alcoholism.
I agree though, his intact virginity is truly the tragedy of the century.
He is really real. Like I know where he works, have referenced him with mutual fb friends and I've seen his dick. He's real.
I still owe him the card with all the sperm paper cutouts falling out like glitter saying " sorry you can't hold your load. Better luck next time "
I bought left over pizza from a guy on Craigslist.
Who knew I could feel anymore shameful at the bar than i usually do...I think my bartender recognizes me from the walk of shame out of his house after i hooked up with his son yesterday
Just cropdusted a little kid that wouldn't get out of my way in Kroger. Welcome to the real world bitch.
Dude. Got a sore throat. Don't know if it's because my body is rejecting Michigan or cause of the bad ass blow job I gave last night
Most people would agree that it IS in fact slutty to give someone head for free ice cream.
i found a picture from last night of you sat on the floor naked, covered in butter and crying. care to explain?
I was hoping you could tell me..
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