I just accidently deleted 60 gigs of porn from my external hard drive. Thats over 300 pornos! I think im gonna cry.
Im surprised that you are even able to text me right now.
Tell me why Im cashing out of Walmart with Smirnoff and catfood
She told me she needed to clarify that we are not fuck buddies, we are best friends that have sex once in a while
I need a pic of your cock for our cock collage
I'm not really sure what went on in my mouth last night but right now it tastes like what I can only imagine is a mixture of astroglide and peanut butter. You hungry?
we did shots in class this morning as part of a presentation. WHY AM I LEAVING THIS COUNTRY?!
Welp just pooped in a garbage can. Guess I'm not better than you at life in any aspect.
I dnt think she needs convincing on the threesome part, it's the threesome with your roommate situation that needs some work
You were, but he disappeared after you said you wanted him to get you pregnant so you'd have a child by the time the Boy Meets World sequel starts
I might be the strongest willed bouncer ever. Earlier tonight a girl flashed me trying to get in. I just replied "Sorry I'm gay", she believed me and left.
Can you rollerblade?
No, why?
Honestly, I was high and picturing us roller blading together. I wanted to see if I could make my dreams a reality.
If I'm going to risk life and limb to wear a Wings jersey to the Garden next week, the least they can do is win.
And the most would be ending up in bed with one of them.
Just got to Evans to buy weed. His mom showed up unannounced. Now the three of us are chillen. Super.
My brother just text me asking if I was ready for the blowjob of my life.
Just to let you know we went to the circus yesterday...in case you didn't remember
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