no, he's only a walking dick if he mans up. right about now he's just a walking transgender.
Through a series of unfortunate circumstances, I think I just sprayed lime juice on my vagina.
The pickup line "You look exactly like my sister" would only work in Arkansas...SCORE!!
i wish i could post a picture of his odd shaped penis on facebook and label it "wtf???"
We banged through her entire lady gaga playlist. I can die happy now
I'm using my ex boyfriends dog to find a guy at the park I could see fuck buddy potential in. I'm the queen of irony.
I tried giving you a bj last night and all you could manage was "Haha that tickles" and "in the morning"
He said I went to go sit outside and is promised I wouldn't leave he brings me a chair and I'm gone. He found me stumbling a half mile away in my socks
Its people like u that make people like me go to rehab. He has a lazy eye for christ sakes.
I lull them into a false sense of security with my gayness. Then when they're vulnerable, I strike, like a snake. A big non-gay snake, with huge balls.
I fucked her wearing an American flag. Now here I am, awake, naked, and flag less. How do I report this to the police?
Last night I woke up and the national rep of his frat was sucking my toe.
The two of us decided to throw a spur-of-the-moment parade and the next thing I know we're 4 miles down the road being followed by 65 drunk strangers
Yeah, he threw a chair and hit her in the side of the head. She started hysterically crying and then proceeded to continue kicking our ass at beerpong. The girls got talent.
Anything special planned for Valentines Day?
Does testing the strength of my coworker’s marriage count?
Randomize
