I hate you but I'm not in hate with you
me and ur bf were arguing about whether coke was vegan. i really hope it's vegan
I convinced her last night that my actual nickname was "No Condom John"
watching hot guy on train scrolling with his blackberry's track ball... o to be that track ball...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's barely 9 am & I've already had an ice cube IN my vagina
That was the apt with beer in the juice and the floor caving in. Don't go.
I feel like I have to sign a death waver before I have sex with him...
The ideal thing to do next party is to tape my boobs down so they don't knock over the pong cups while playing defense. They came back to hurt us this time
We are so blessed to to have nicely shaped vaginas
I thank god almighty everyday
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was thinking that maybe I should not apply to Wells Fargo because they def have me on candid camera taking a drunken nap at 3am in their lobby.
I'm eating your cookies as payment for having to listen to you. Happy sex
I just wanna get drunk in a castle. Is that so much to ask?
This is why we can never be just regular friends. The shit we do is not regular
I got sriracha sauce on my mask while I was eating fast food, now wearing it makes me hungry
Listen, I love you but you cannot refer to your dick as the holy sister anymore
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