this just has baby written all over it
i recognized the place by the puke stain i left on the pool table when i hooked up with his roommate.
four guys that i have slept with have come into my job today. FOUR. i feel like it's like bring your sex partners to work day.
i left with the words "thank you for undersanding my sluttiness"
downstairs . braiding the drunk passed out girls hair, she will thank us In the morning
We tried to line dance with everyone but it turned into drunken stumbling and attempting to grind on random frat boys. I feel that this might turn into an every Thursday thing.
We still need to grow old, buy a house, and drink 40's while wearing old people sunglasses, staring at the young studs mowing our lawn.
I just need to repress my desire to share my impressive chugging abilities with the world and I won't black out so much
I am day drunk. Get ready to see my dick.
I ate the last cupcake. I'm sorry. It was in the refrigerator mocking me. So I ate it. And it was glorious. But I'm sorry.
Your brother slept on my deck. There was a key under the mat. Relapse party success.
Turns out floaties are a great thing after a couple bottles of vodka
I'm proud of all of us. Somehow we all survived another Jägerbomb Tuesday
I despise everything about her. Except her tits.
Remember how I was complaining about how no guy has ever gotten me off?
Randomize
