we were taking shots of hot tequila, which is even worse than it sounds
just put a funnel in my mouth and pour the tequila in with a little emergen-c
I am waking up at 7am to go to church with him and his family... I better get eaten out tonight.
She's hidden vodka up her skirt and is riding a parking meter. Things can only get better
Sorry if I put you in that 'glad we're hanging out but I'm gonna go fuck your cousin' kind of position
Let's play a little game of "Last Night Never Happened"
Duuuude - Drag Queen Bingo wasn't supposed to end like thissss
you were like "guys ... i think i got fingered while dancing tonight"
our poor poor cab driver
She climbed up the stairs with three brownies in one fist, two in the other, and one in her mouth. Also, she opened the bedroom door with her foot. I may be in love.
All I know is if i get a free preview weekend of HBO then I am recording Kindergarten Cop.
Dude we need to hang out soon. I'm in the mood to get arrested again.
It was like sex on an active volcano surrounded by the night sky and bloodhounds. And by that I mean it was nice.
I dropped a piece of Mac and cheese in the shower and I almost still ate it. Stoned, but not stoned enough to degrade myself.
I think I was judged by a squirrel this morning during the walk...
We are balling out on levels, I think mikes about to go to jail. something to do with a unicorn and rainbows, the cops are not being reasonable.
Randomize
