You do realize the lyrics aren't "hold me close TONY DANZA" right?
You can't be serious.
we were exchanging secrets last night... she told me about how she put markers in her vaj in middle school. found a keeper.
He has some good qualities. Beneath the layers of asshole and fat.
Found your pants in the mailbox
What were my pants doing in the mailbox?
I don't know but there's postage on them
making your facebook status TEQUILA is like basically saying "im easy tonight. feel free to take advantage"
Just so you know swallowing does not help chest colds. Your Phd can suck my dick
Best surprise in my car. A cookie, sliced kiwi and the rest of my margarita. Work is going to be awesome.
i want us to warm up up with us making out while i lay you down touching and feeling all the spots you know are going to get you warmed up. im gonna move down your body kissing every inch as i move down past your panty line ;)
Did you watch the carolina game tonight?
WHY AM I THE ONLY ONE CONCERNED ABOUT THE SEAGULL IN THE OVEN
It's been a long time since I got "Talk about Glen's enormous penis" drunk
This was like angel cum on the bread of life filled with the nectar of the gods
I need to be put in a corner surrounded by pamphlets of stds and babies
Last night I recall my hair going up in flames. This is evident by the burnt hair smell that is following me around this morning
We walked into the RA's room and he said "is that alcohol" and I screamed "IT'S WATER" and ran out and Vanessa slammed the door and started making out with him.
only 3 drinks in and he showed me his fursuit, please come pick me up
Randomize
