Good face, no body. And apparently her vagina is related to chewbaca.
Wow senior week shows you new things about yourself
Is this the I'm gay speech?
No, asshole. I'm not gay. But if I was I think I would do better than fucking Nick Lachey.
you came home covered in oatmeal wearing a tutu holding a stolen wrotting pumpkin and "its a girl" balloons tied around your neck.you were whispering the lyrics to aaron carters 'aarons party'. i think the real question was what DIDNT you drink last night
25 True Facts That Sound Fake AF
i need you to recap everything for me beyond "i think i'm gonna try vodka-pong"
he squeezed my boobs like he didn't know what else to do with them, then turned down head...
told you he was gay.
Woke up with two cats staring at me. One covered in puke thats giving me a look that says it might be my fault. Where am I? Come get me.
I just got checked out by a paramedic whilst their sirens were on. I'm doing something right
my drunken justification for peeing in her closet was that her shoes were ugly
27 Hairstyles That Always Come With A Matching Personality
he peed on his own floor last night after we left the bar. pretty much sums up how i feel about the evening
at crossfit today a guy shit his pants while deadlifting 405 lbs. coach made fun of him then congratulated him on his new personal record.
Got dumped. Now accepting nominations for my extra Dave Mathews ticket. No xboyfriends. Must cast final votes by Monday. Good luck everyone
Who'd have thought a guy with a lisp would be so good with his tongue?
Why is there multiple peanut butter and toasts stuck to the fridge door?
I spend so much of my life shaving my body hair off and I want nothing more than his beard in all my hairless places.