I just ate 10 fun sized 3 musakteers.. I'm pretty sure I'm about to start my period.
Talk to you next week
Any toy can be an adult toy. Location, location, location.
Can I ask u a weird question?
do u have the hershy squirts too?
apparently red wine has the total opposite effect that whiskey does on his dick
These 25 Drunks Should’ve Gotten Cut Off A Long Time Ago
I puked in the cab and in my hair and he didnt even know
I'm going to take the bottles back.. And maybe get an x-ray
when your english prof writes "this was a real good paper" on your essay, you know you're at the wrong college
new years resolution: more sex, less car punching, more chipotle.
just woke up to find an unpeeled banana, with a condom on, halfway into my vagina. this better not be you trying to be funny
27 Freshmen Who Really Didn’t Know What They Were Getting In To
so does the 200 for rent and 150 for utilities include the never telling my boyfriend about the guys i bring home.. or is that extra?
he's doing fine. just headbutted the wall and threw up
So it turns out rose was the bear hunting girl. Fuck my life
None of those words made sense together.
so, give him that "thank you for fighting for my freedom bj" & he wont even remember what you said in that six min voice mail.
That's what he gets for shittin at the strip club. Who does that??
No, I'm just drunk and was excited cause a hot stranger bought me tacos.