True. She actually gives a fuck. A quality looked down upon if she wants to be one of us
you kept insisting that i was jake gyllenhaal and you were heath ledger.
he bit the head off a dead goose for 5 beers. this is my future boyfriend.
She thinks she's a fairy, dude. A real fucking fairy with wings and shit.
took adderall before wrapping presents, ended up making paper snowflakes for two hours
I made a bet with her that she would show me her tits if I finished my beer. Only on spring break.
Found trail of ibuprofen on ground. I'm like the intervention version of e.t.
She slapped me in the face with a McDouble. Just threw it right at my face while I was driving... That is why we can't bring her out in public.
I'm straight up riding in the back of my truck in a bean bag chair right now. Feet propped up and four loko in hand. Glorious.
When you're really drunk, Japanese toilets just have an unnecessary amount of buttons.
Like Is it appropriate to tell your boss you banged a guy in the back of a truck at a wedding? Probably not.
I know I'm not a hook-up kind of chick but he is a firefighter & an EMS worker. I felt like maybe I'd be a good person if I let a good person inside of me
so i showed up to the bars in a sombrero and a tie as a headband... so yeah, they didn't let me in
It was rocky mountain showdown of course we got shitfaced and talked about eating buffaloes
wait you like me?? for my personality??
I know I was surprised too
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