yeah, we don't understand. the wings losing for guys is like girls finding objects in their body..just weird and sad
you know you've been playing too much mario kart when you see a curve in the road ahead and see yourself drifting around it
We had sex in the ocean but the tide took our clothes away too. Its no fun walking back to the dorm wearing only a beach blanket between you.
I got a job at a micro-brewery. Now who made the bigger mistake, them or me?
she stopped mid-blowjob to explain how to acheive the haircut shown in the movie
I just had a dream that I was pulling you around downtown on a sled, from bar to bar. Dear lord if we start that there's no hope for us
my mom went out and bought me new sheets and redecorated my room. its like she's more excited for me to get laid tomorrow for the first time in two months than I am.
I think the 8 yr old is hitting on me and they just prayed for the salvation of third world countries
I would totally lead with that as a line.'So, I was on Legends of the Hidden temple as a kid.. Your place or mine?'
He Dutch ovened me while I was hiding under the covers from his mom. Needless to say it did not end well.
Dude. I don't even want cuddles. I just want an acknowledgement that I just had balls in my mouth.
I'm literally beginning to think that my sex dreams are prophesies
I didn't want dick. I wanted spaghetti.
while giving me head, she stopped, looked up at me smiling and said "ill never be able to look at bananas the same way again" and then went back to work.
who knew being a fake dominatrix could be so fun?
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