if I see one grey pube I'm spitting his penis out!
he just quoted gucci mane to try and get me to give him head.
The hardest part of getting a new computer is deliberating whether to start the cycle of porn and viruses all over again.
Judging by her face, I'd say she's at least dabbled with meth...
Khloé Kardashian Finally Speaks Out About The Tristan Thompson Cheating Scandal
i mean i should have known that when i started taking shots with my zumba instructor i was in for a rough night...
She's riding a tiny four-wheeler and has a Dos Equis in her hand. I at least have to meet her.
Totalylr drunk. Coveredc in cryola marker. Loving it. Straight men everywhere. Don't be surprises when I'm pregbat romorrowwwww
Eating an ice cream sandwich while your little bro gets me weed. May I adopt him?
At orientation, some girl is asking, loudly, where she can get weed. Everyone looks discussed but are paying very close attention to people's answers.
15 Porn Memes You’re Only Allowed To Laugh At If You’re Over 18
Did I mention I hooked up with another country star? I think I need some sort of trophy for each time, yah know? Or like a sash and I win a badge or patch for each person. Like a slutty Girl Scout.
guy at the bar just asked how many cows we have on our land, then proceeds to ask me out. you know your from the country when....
as much as I don't like snorting drugs, I would totally be fine with someone doing a line off my ass. that's just a whole new up
They both showed up at the same time... to surprise me. One had flowers and the other had chocolates. Needless to say, I will be at the bar all weekend long trying to figure out how this happens.
It's 7am. I'm sitting on the curb in last nights clothes with a nose bleed and no idea how to get home. Low moment I feel.
One a scale of one to hella drunk, how gracefully can I make it down those stairs