Why don't you ever send me any naked pics
i swear to god, this restaurant is playing a john tesh cover of a song from aladdin
If you really hate me that much, you need to stop letting me put my penis inside of you. It sends the wrong message.
Hungover snowboarding. Puked off the lift and traumatized a group lesson for kids. Crash course on adulthood.
I refuse to go to this wedding alone, or sober. Practice drunk-walking in heels and a Bridesmaid dress begins tonight.
Why are you seriouly talking to me about this when there naked pics of blake lively on the internet? Priorities man...
his life revolves around getting high and answering people on yahoo answers. he's perfect for you.
If I interpreted our horoscopes correctly...you should be coming home with an 8 ball. Just saying.
With me living this close to Mexico now, Tequila is just a geographical choice at this point if nothing else.
Getting sick, pulled the filter off a camel crush and rolled it into my joint to clear my sinuses. If there were stoner awards, I'd receive one.
I got picked up after "I just threw up in my face". Then I had very specific instructions involving the bathtub.
So... In conclusion, do I bring my vibrator and risk not only having it getting taken out at security, but also exposing my dad to my neon green vibrator, or just leave it here?
Just spilled a coffee mug full of scolding hot oatmeal on my bare dick. Hope you're having a good Friday night too.
You texted me the words "butt stuff" 53 times in a four hour period last night.
It’s like a buffet of marriages! Every option is available to you!
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