Well how sick are u. Ive got a good immune system.
so how does one go about finding a summer fling?
take advantage of an intern
I never thought I would get head to the lion king soundtrack
He kept screaming "it's so seductive" while he was humping the wall
Apparently he's taking the slut he cheated on me with on a cruise for her birthday. THAT COULD HAVE BEEN ME. TITANTIC STYLE.
And I think short bridesmaids dresses are the best idea especially for bathroom sex
I did, I'm just saying. Once the drinking starts my nipples are no longer my control.
They ran out of ice at the party, so I fixed my drink with frozen broccoli....the show must go on!
When one of my seniors asked "Rough night?" I realized my poor decisions involving Tuesday night drinking did not go unnoticed.
Check snapchat. Selfie game still on point mid vomit.
I just found out my younger brother has me saved in his contacts as "Womb Primer" and I don't know what to do with this information
Made him watch 4 hours of HGTV then told him I was too tired for sex.
Savage
I would steal a car if I knew it had wheat thins in it
is it necessary to steal the whole car?
I just watched someone put a diaper on a cat..I'm to high for this.
i'm now remembering the last part of my nigght....ugh. apperently i bargained with the wendys drive up girl after they closed and got "w/e they had left" for $7
Randomize
