Shit chicky whatchu wearin rt now, ur skins?
Oh dear, kinda... in ur sweats!
U look good, r we getting naked in ur car?
We just had the worst moment of our late twenties.... We just realized we are too old for the real world
She just face-timed her mom and had her watch all of us toast to her grandmas tits..
What's up with the fire hydrant in the laundry room?
Use "feeling words"
Yay
It's like everything I need in life within a five block radius: booze, toilets, dogs, dicks.
yeah she's crazy. she fought a possum in my alley because it was "being a cagey little cunt"
Your boobs stole my birthday thunder!
I didn't know White Castle was open when your sober.
Googling enemas while I get a pedicure ... My life in one senence
how do you know everyone's mad at you?
I just woke up feeling shameful
Please god tell me you aren't pregaming your date alone.
So! As of five minutes ago I've officially masturbated in every room in my apartment
Dude, I helped you move in yesterday...
I accidentally stubbed my dick
What does that even mean?
A total of 3 guys left my apartment this morning. That was my first clue to my black out endeavors last night. Gotta love wine Wednesdays.
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