I successfully cooked a taquito with a lighter! My stomach hurts now tho.. im either guna blame it on the undercooked taquito or im feeling guily about porkin my brothers gf a lil bit ago
so after he got his stomach pumped, he asked for a smoking room.
I never thought I'd hear the words "aww you pulled out" and "you're so sweet" in the same sentence.
I woke up 25 minutes ago and have been high for 20. Impressive?
I don't know why girls would even talk to someone as drunk as I was.
Nothing makes my dick softer than hot girls in rain boots.
We started a mustache riot at white castle at 4 in the morning. Will explain in detail.
Look if 10 am was too early to go barrel tasting the winery would not be open.
He took a picture with a naked dude. I think he just walked out of that deep ginger closet.
Ok- my dad's ex-wife's Irish nephew. Weird if we fuck or not?
I just encountered the same creepy guy I showed you, he jumped inside the dumpster screaming.
Thanks for the morning blowjob. Scientifically proven you can't have a bad day if it starts with a blowjob.
I know you are gonna wanna ask a lot of questions but when we are home I need to cover your face with deli meat and photograph it
There's nothing more rewarding than telling you that I fucked your dad
Now all I have unanswered questions and a fucked up finger
Randomize
